Why we do, what we do

We all make countless decisions every day, some conscious, some unconscious. We decide whether to get up in the morning, what to eat, what to wear etc. Many of these decisions seem very trivial to us though. On what do we base all these decisions? Now that is the question.

How great it would be to be able to say, that I base all my decisions solely on what it is good for me, on what would bring me joy! Had I answered this question before, I would have just said that. But unfortunately, that seems not be the case. Last week I suddenly understood, that some of my decisions are based on the good for other people, not on what is good for me. I still seem from time to time have a belief activated, that I am not good enough or worthy enough as I am. That I have to somehow justify my good.

What we base our decision on, tells a lot about us. We all have beliefs about ourselves, that we might not even be aware of. Yet these beliefs control our lives and our decision making: how far we will go and how successful we will be. It is going to be of great value for us to notice these beliefs. And a great beginning is to start noticing why we do, what we do.

It is impossible to change something we don’t notice we are doing. When we know, why we do, what we do, we can change both our behavior and our end results. Considering only about others in our decision making, expecting love and gratitude from them in return, will leave us empty and hollow until we have nothing left but resentful thoughts. But by doing what is good for ourselves on the other hand, will fill us with strength and help us to be more considerate and compassionate towards others without any undue expectations.

We cannot give someone else something we don’t ourselves first have. This alone is a good enough reason to base all our decisions upon our own well-being. We cannot provide well-being and love to others if we don’t first have them towards ourselves. Also understanding ourselves and our decision making better is the only way to a more fulfilling life. Therefore it really pays to find out why we do, what we do.

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