Happiness is an inside job. Our happiness doesn’t depend on anybody else, but our own focus. It is said, that we are as happy or unhappy as we decide to be. And so it is.
There are circumstances in this world, that are similar to a bunch of people, yet some of them are happy and some are miserable. Therefore the circumstances themselves cannot be the source of that happiness, or unhappiness. What is it then? Their attitude, their inward disposition, their focus in life.
I have seen miserable people, who are doing fine in their lives. They have clothes, fairly good jobs, food on their plates, roof over their heads, solid families and yet they are unhappy. I have also seen content and happy people, who are worst struck by life. They have been fired from their jobs, been in car crashes, or given the worst diagnoses ever. Yet they are happy about their lives. The difference between these people is their focus: the first ones focus on what they don’t have and the second on what they do. Focusing on what we have, creates happiness.
Sometimes we are just too far from happiness to even try to achieve it. When I was clinically depressed, there was no way I could be happy about anything. But luckily I somehow understood, that I didn’t have to. All I needed to do was to feel a tiny bit better each day. For me that meant to find out every day and write down at least one thing, that didn’t make me feel bad that day. That could have been just a ray of sun, a squirrel crossing the road, or a rosebush blooming by the sidewalk. They didn’t bring me joy or happiness, but neither did they make me feel worse. The day I listed three such incidents, was the day I knew, I was heading the right direction.
The main point is, we can decide to be happy or at least not to be unhappy anymore. When we decide that, we will find a way. One tiny step at a time. Anyway the most important thing is to decide. If you are physically sick, you are going to do something about it. Feel the same way about your happiness. If you are unhappy, decide to change the situation. Decide it now. Today. Don’t wait a second longer. You are worth it.