About Complaining

For sometime ago I listened to a couple of women, who seemed to be saying only positive things, but were in fact complaining about everything. I have noticed, that much of the interaction in our society seems to be based on complaining. The more we complain, the more eager ears we have. I have often wondered, why it so easy to concentrate on things, that don’t work the way we want them to, instead of those, that do.

Complaining is just comparing in other clothes. When we complain, we are in fact just comparing something to the image we hold in our minds of how we think it should be. Things are as they are, and by complaining about them we are just holding ourselves on the negative side of life.

Complaining will keep our focus on things, that don’t work the way we would want them to. And what we focus on, we will have more of. Complaining will eventually diminish all the good  things in our lives by making them feel smaller and less. Complaining will make us ungrateful.

I myself don’t see any point in wallowing in all the negative things, that may or may not happen on this Earth. Concentrating solely on the bad stuff, that happened or might have happened somewhere else on the planet, and that has no bearing or connection whatsoever on me, will not make me feel good. It will not make me feel secure. And my first priority to myself is to feel good and secure.

I believe, it would be wise to more often think about, what is our motivation, when we share something.  Are we just doing the popular thing and participating in something we don’t ourselves believe in, and that makes us feel bad, or are we sharing the words of kindness and encouragement to each other? At least I will in the future focus even more determinately on what I will say.

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What I Learned from Vacation

While on vacation the beautiful island of Tenerife taught me several life lessons, that also go for our lives in general. Here are some of the observations I made.

First if one doesn’t know/decide, what one wants to see, one will probably only see a very limited version of the place. Even while the poolside might be a very comfortable place, it still lacks the depth and beauty, what the whole island has to offer. This also goes for life in general. If we don’t know/decide, what we want, we probably will miss a lot. Any decision is better than none at all.

Secondly once in awhile it pays to take the scenic road. It might take longer to reach one’s destination, but the view is so breathtaking. Life is the same. Even when we know, where we want to end up, it pays to enjoy the journey and not rush into things. To take one’s time and enjoy all the little things, that life has to offer.

My third observation is, that it pays off to keep one’s eyes and mind open. The directions and road signs appear unannounced. This also goes for our lives as directions to our goals will appear suddenly and often from unexpected places. It is wise to be open to take notice of them.

And finally sometimes it is worth going back to reach one’s destination. When one has driven astray and lost direction, it is worthwhile to admit this and go back and start on the right route again. Life follows the same rule. Sometimes we lose our bearings and mundane activities begin to take us the wrong way. It pays to acknowledge this and remind oneself of the goals one has. To regroup and go after them again.

All in all life is very simple: know/decide what you want, go after it, but don’t forget to enjoy the journey while it lasts!

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About Vibration

I love Law of Attraction, as it gives me the power. The power to choose whatever life experience I want to. I guess we all love LoA for the same reason. But I really have to stress here, that according to it, we do not get, what we want. We get, what we are.

This is a vibrational Universe and we are vibrational beings emitting a mix of vibrations all the time. There is never just one thing we want, there are many. Therefore a mix of vibrations. And Law of Attraction always matches us up with whatever vibration we are emitting at any given time. We can want something so bad, but if we are no match to it, we don’t get it. Whatever we are getting, we are already being.

How to know then, what we emit and what comes to us? Our feelings are messengers bringing us information about what our vibration is. They are delivering us a status report, giving us vital information of where we stand. They are not good or bad in their own right, they are just messages. The more closely we listen to them, the more we get the message they bring.

So if I am feeling blue and down, it is just a status report, that, what will come, will perhaps not be of my highest good. If I am on the other hand feeling eager and joyful, it just states, that I am on the right path towards my desires. Therefore it pays to find the good-feeling things and thoughts of any given situation.

I try to be very particular, what I choose to focus on, and what my vibration therefore is. And this has caused me to firmly believe, that Life is always working out for me! We are all capable of focusing on whatever we want to. Whatever we focus on, we will emit vibration of and get more of. When we choose to focus only on good-feeling things and thoughts, Law of Attraction will match us up with more similar things. And suddenly Life seems to always work in our favor.

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About Judging

It is so easy to laugh at and criticize someone, who is acting differently. So easy to judge someone without knowing anything about them. We are so eager to separate others, expel them and disassociate them from us.

When we judge another, we are in fact judging something in ourselves. Whatever it is, that’s rubbing us the wrong way about someone else, is something we find inside of us. So instead of changing ourselves to feel better, we judge others, who have similar kinds of characteristics.

When someone else judges us, they are just trying to make themselves feel better. They are themselves feeling insecure, inferior even, and feel, that the only way to feel better, is to make everyone else feel less and smaller than themselves. When we understand this, it will be easier to not let it affect us, to have sympathy even towards someone feeling so bad about themselves.

Every single one of us is doing the best we can with what we have. Even the ones acting out, criticizing others and trying to make them feel less, and those always complaining. Everyone thinks they will feel better with whatever they are doing and how they are doing it. When we judge another, we are in fact saying, that this other person doesn’t deserve to feel better. And yet again, we all have an equal right to exist in this Universe.

Whenever we feel sympathy towards another person, we will not be so eager to judge them. I always try to give another person a benefit of doubt. Maybe they are just having a bad day: a row with their spouse, no coffee in the morning, pet being sick on their favorite carpet etc. I would not want to judge someone just because their pet was sick in the morning!

We can all do the same, give another person a benefit of doubt before judging them. We all can be a little kinder towards each other. For me kindness is the key to a better life. And we all can be better.

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Secret Friends

Every day we meet new people both in real life and in social media. With some we click immediately. Some seem a little off, but they don’t bother us that much. And then there are those, who absolutely ruffle our feathers the wrong way. Oh, yeah.

Abraham-Hicks says, that we can only meet with people, who are on the same vibrational plane as we ourselves are. So as I see it: it shouldn’t even be possible for me to meet these people, as they seem to be on a completely different vibrational plane than me. And yet meet we do.

I have come to think, that maybe I’m looking this from a wrong angle altogether. Mary Morrissey tells a story, how Dalai Lama calls his adversaries his secret friends. Friends are people, who bring out the best of us, who make us grow as human beings. Therefore I have come to believe, that these people are in fact my secret friends.

Without these people I would not be the person I am. Annoying as they are, these people challenge me and things I believe I know. They teach me patience and tolerance. They teach me things about myself, that even I didn’t know existed. They really force me to grow as a human being.

We all have these secret friends. Next time they bring their bitter gifts to you, instead of cursing them and answering with fire to fire, try to thank them in your mind for the gift of knowledge they offer to you. Try to see them as they are: friends, who demand you to be patient and tolerant, and to grow to be a better you.

I most certainly am grateful for all the friends I have: those, who encourage me and agree with me, and most of all those secret ones, who annoy me and disagree with me. For I know, that they are the ones, who really challenge me to evolve and, in the end of the day, truly challenge me to be a better human being.

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Feeling Disappointed

Hard as we try there will come times in our lives, when we will feel disappointed. Disappointment is always caused by comparison. In this time and age of social media it is so easy to lose one’s focus and start to compare oneself to others.

This is something I felt last week. I felt, that having followed Law of Attraction for so long, I should be further along my path. I felt, that everyone else was doing so much better than me. That others are succeeding in what I still struggle for. In other words I was comparing myself to others without even knowing anything about them or their stories.

It is important to understand, that these feelings of disappointment are just the voice of our own ego comparing us to others without seeking any information to base its verdict on. And the ego is only the voice inside, that we ourselves have created so many years ago to keep us safe. It has no other merit except what we ourselves choose to give it. It is the voice of conformity and it’s only goal is to keep us from shining too bright.

There is no-one on this planet, that is exactly like another. Every single one of us is one-of-a-kind, unique expression of life. No-one else knows,  what another has been through. Comparing one of us to another is like comparing apples to oranges! It just cannot be done.  Every single one of us is valuable beyond any measure and by one’s own right!

I reminded myself, that I am, as a matter of fact, all the time doing the very best I can. I reminded myself, that it is the feeling of contentment and happiness, that I am seeking for. Feeling better about oneself and life in general is the best reward anyone could ever get. It really doesn’t matter, how things look from the outside, as this is not a competition, the main thing is the feeling we have inside.

You, too, are far more wonderful than you think! There is no-one in this whole universe, that could be compared to you! You are a unique expression of life, one of a kind being. And this whole universe just would not be the same without you!

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Heart Finders

We all are life expressing itself. We all are therefore loved and blessed beings. There are more things going our way than other way around, if we just pause to notice them. But our minds are wired to keep us safe and to avoid pain at any cost, and because of that they are keen to notice anything, that could be hazardous or painful to us. Still we have to power to focus our minds on anything we want. Whatever we focus on, we see more evidence of.

We can choose to see things, that are threatening and scary. When we focus on these things, we will feel unsafe and unloved. And our focus will cause us to see more and more of these kinds of things. Or we can choose to not scare ourselves and convince our minds, that we live in a friendly universe. And our focus will make us notice more and more evidence of this.

I stopped scaring myself a couple of years ago. I mostly don’t listen or watch any news at all. I believe, that whatever I need to know, will be revealed to me, as has been happening so far. I rather not discuss about illness or misfortunes, not my own or anyone else’s. I rather concentrate on what is good in life. I rather hear, what great things have happened to you! And rejoice with you. For a long time I have also tried to wholly and completely quit complaining and little by little I am succeeding in that too.

For sometime now I have been seeing these hearts everywhere. There are hearts in clouds and on the foam in a car wash. There are hearts in my soup and on coffee stains. I believe this is the way Universe is trying to tell me, that I’m on the right track. That I am beloved and blessed being, like we all are. And every time I see heart I answer back: Thank you, Universe! I love you, too!

Lets be heart finders together, for there are hearts to be found for you, too. Life and Universe are all the time trying to tell you how amazing and loved you are, should you just notice it. Slow down, take time to see how incredibly lucky you are by just being alive. Let life love you! And see how many hearts you can find!

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Random acts of kindness

Random acts of kindness are small acts of kindness we do without expecting anything back. Mostly to unknown recipients. Last week February 17th was a tribute and unofficial holiday for just this. There are a lot of studies, that show, that being kind and compassionate, will boost our own well-being as well as make someone else happy and more prone to pay the gesture forward to someone else.

This Valentine’s Day I got this idea of making the day special for someone unknown to me. So I went to a local coffee shop and suggested the idea, that I would pay for 5 coffees and they would give them free of charge for the next five persons to arrive only wishing them happy Valentine’s Day. They were game and thought it was a cute idea. I don’t know who got the coffees, but hopefully it made them feel special, cause they are.

Then came 17th February. Remembering the previous experiment I had made, I wanted to try again. So while shopping in the local grocery store I also bought a small gift card and gave it to the cashier. He was totally blown away by the gesture. Probably something, that had never happened to him before. And I felt huge surge of satisfaction for making someone else feel special. Then on my way to work I decided to visit yet another coffee shop and made the same deal with them as with the another coffee shop on 14th. They were totally on board and thought it was fantastic idea.

Last Saturday, when I went to play squash, I put a token to a locker by the bowling alley, where I had found one myself the previous week. I remember, how great it felt to find one, so wanted to give that same feeling to someone else. It made me feel like a secret fairy godmother!

But these acts don’t need to be material, they can be compliments we pay to someone or help we offer without asking. So if you want to feel really good about yourself do something for someone else, say a compliment to a fellow passenger, carry the bags of an elderly, or even just shovel the snow from someone’s driveway. Guaranteed to make you feel better about yourself while also making someone else’s day.

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About Contrast

There’s contrast (unwanted things) everywhere. Contrast allows us to know ourselves better and to know what we prefer. We cannot truly know that, if we don’t know the opposite of it first. How would we know ourselves as abundant, if we didn’t know, what being poor meant; how would we know, that we are good, if there was no evil anywhere for comparison. These are just the opposite ends of the same stick. We just have to stop demonizing, that which we don’t like, and simply start choosing, that which we prefer.

Things are always working for us no matter how much contrast there is around us. I have lately been reminding myself just this. There have been some unwanted things in my life to clarify my preferences. Here’s a couple of examples:

First I thought, that I had bought something, that I already had gotten for free. The thought occurred to me at night (as these kinds of thoughts often do). I decided to push my pause-button and told this fear thought, that I would address it sometime in the near future, but not that night. In the mean time I reminded myself, that things are always working out for me. On closer inspection it turned out to be a false thought after all. I learned, that I prefer to be sure before I buy something, that I don’t already have it.

The locker room door to the ladies’ changing room was locked. It was reserved to a group, that was coming later. The only free-of-charge lockers are in that particular locker room. The cashier told, that there would be some lockers left by the bowling alley. So I would have to change in the other locker room and then go back to the bowling alley to place my stuff in one of these lockers. But these lockers require a 50cent token. I reminded myself, that there must be some good in this, as things are always working out for me. So I chose a locker and stuffed my things in it and was just about to find a token, when I realized, that someone had forgotten (or left on purpose) their token in the lock. And it was the only locker with a token! I noticed, that I appreciate these random acts of kindness.

I ordered something, that didn’t arrive. As I eagerly waited for my purchase to arrive, I at the same time patiently reminded myself yet again, that things are always working out for my benefit. Finally I called in and politely told them, what had happened and they immediately promised to send me a new product and promised, that I could even keep the original order free of charge, should it still arrive! I found out, that I preferred being kind and patient over the anger and frustration, that I could have felt in this situation.

We cannot avoid unwanted things happening in our lives, we can only choose, how to react to them. How we react is totally up to us and no-one else. We can get all upset, stress out and lose even sleep over things, or we can concentrate on trusting, that things are always turning out to our best benefit. So next time something unwanted is happening in your life, trust the universe, trust your own resourcefulness to carry you through. Remind yourself, that things are always working out for you! Cause they are!

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I am enough

Only the other week I was watching a video from Marisa Peer about the biggest disease affecting humanity these days: the lack of self-worth. And I know this disease to be true for I suffered from it for years.

The worst feeling in the world is the feeling of lacking any worth. It ill make us try to compensate the situation with all kinds of unhealthy ways, neither of which will actually make us feel better. On the contrary they will make us feel even worse. They might actually make us succeed in some area of our lives, but because we are still thinking that we are not the real deal, that success won’t mean a thing to us. Validation we might get from others will only sound like hollow words in our ears, if we ourselves don’t believe it.

For years this was true to me, too. No matter how good I was in my job and my life, I still felt I wasn’t enough. I have moved a long way from those days, but even though I thought I already knew my own self-worth, just the other week I noticed, that I’m still making some of my decisions based on other people’s good, not my own. So I still seem to have more to do in my self-worth issues.

I decided to take some ease steps to correct the situation. According to the examples Marisa shares in her video I, too, wrote “I am enough” on my mirror, that I have on my desk and see every day! Actually I kind of like seeing my own picture with those validating words at the same time! They make me feel pretty good about myself. Whenever I look at those words I feel I don’t have to strive for any other form of validation anymore.

This is a very cheap and effective way to feel good in an instant. I really recommend it to everyone. All you need to do is write on a post-it-note the magic words and post it anywhere you easily can and will see every day. It is guaranteed to give a boost on your self-worth every time you see it.

Watch the video in here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lw3NyUMLh7Y&t=14s
More about amazing Marisa in here: https://www.marisapeer.com/
(at the moment you even get a FREE Self Esteem Mini-Course from Marisa in her website)

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